The Rest of Our Stay and Release Days

I start walking to the NICU and back which is good for my recovery.  I get regular pain meds, incision checks, and blood pressure checks.  My nurses are all very nice.  The tempurpedic mattresses in the post-partum beds at Medical Center of Plano are crazy comfy. 


During our stay in the NICU, we get to talk to some of the other couples there.  One of them was even a premature delivery due to a much worse case of preeclampsia than mine.  Being in the NICU is so stressful that the divorce rate of couples in the NICU is quite elevated and we could definitely tell that it was taking it's toll on some of the couples we met.  There was one couple that barely looked at each other and barely talked and never seemed pleasant.  We worried for them.  We know that we are so very blessed as others have much more difficult situations to deal with.  I will say that you can see God in the NICU.  You can see Him in all the miracle of the tiny babies fighting for survival, in the expertise and technology that's working to save them, and in the spirit of many of the parents as they have faith in Him to take care of their baby. 


They finally get Naomi to pass her meconium and they start feeding her in addition to the IV.  As long as she's sating okay they bottle feed her, but they feed her through a tube in her nose if she's having any breathing issues.  They gradually increase the feed amount as they decrease the IV drip until she gradually gets off the IV.  They do a biopsy to check for a genetic condition that she may have.  (About a week later it comes back negative.)  They gradually decrease her dependence on the oxygen until they remove it all together.  It's wonderful to gradually watch her have fewer and fewer tubes connected to her. 

I keep trying to pump but I go about 3 days without anything.  I'm frustrated and concerned that it's not working.  Finally one evening after a kangaroo session with Naomi (skin to skin / chest to chest contact) I started producing milk.  We were so excited.  We arrange to start trying to breastfeed the next day.  We only try to breastfeed one or two of her feedings at first and she still gets her formula.  I'll cover more of the details in a later post on breastfeeding. 


I'm scheduled to be released on Friday and I'm so excited.  I put on my going home outfit and start packing up all my stuff.  The doctor comes in to tell me that my blood pressure numbers are too high.  I won't be discharged today, but instead will be put on blood pressure meds and monitored for the night.  I cry again.  Once again, nothing seems to be going right, I'm so ready to go home and I'm full of hormones. 


I finally get discharged on Saturday.  We don't leave until that evening so we can stay with Naomi.  We fill my prescriptions and stop by Alex and Terah's house for a quick dinner before heading home.  We're sad though.  Here we are, finally heading home, without our baby.  Anyone who's ever had to leave their baby in the NICU can tell you that this first night heading home without your baby is so hard and so sad.  Brian has been so strong throughout this experience and through all my tears and I can tell this is just too much.  I take my turn as the strong one and give him permission to cry.  We call the NICU in the middle of the night to check on her and the nurse is so kind and understanding.  Naomi's doing great. 

On Sunday, when we get to the NICU we find out that Naomi's doing so great that her IV has been removed and she will be moved to the Baby Steps area of the NICU that evening.  This is the final step before being discharged.  She now just has monitor wires attached.  We're ecstatic and keep asking when she will get to go home. 

On Monday, they let us know that she will be released on Tuesday.  Yippee!  In preparation, she gets her hearing test and her Hep B vaccine and we get to sponge bathe her (with a tutorial from the NICU nurse).  The upside to the NICU is that you almost get some training wheels.

On Tuesday, we roll up to the NICU with our empty travel system (car seat and stroller) and some clothes to take her home in.  I'm so worried that they'll tell us that we can't take her home after all since nothing seems to have gone well, but when we get there we're relieved to find that they still plan to release her today.  We dress her in a cute ducky footed pajama.  The nurse goes through all of our discharge instructions and makes sure that we get her loaded into her car seat properly.  They send us home with a bunch of goodies - extra formula, nipples, nasal aspirators, thermometers, pacifiers, etc.  We roll through the back of the NICU and through the labor and delivery area so that we can say bye and show off Naomi to some of the nurses that we've gotten to know along the way.  Then we get loaded in the car and head home calling family along the way.  I'm riding in back with Naomi.  We can't believe we finally are home with her.

The Aftermath - Mag and NICU

...continued from Naomi's Birthday. 


So, they've just taken my baby back to the nursery to have the doctor look at her breathing.  Then they tell me that my urine output is not what it should be which can be symptomatic of post-delivery complications from the pre-eclampsia, so I'll be wheeled back to labor and delivery and administered magnesium sulfate (mag for short).  I cry.  I was so ready to move on to postpartum, nothing seems to be going right, and I'm full of hormones. 


We make arrangements to leave most of my belongings in what will eventually be my post-partum room and Brian goes down there to grab essentials.  They start my mag drip.  Mag is a horrible and evil drug.  I've never felt that close to death.  Also Naomi was transferred to the NICU because of her breathing issues and we really don't know much at first.  This is how the next day goes - at least my hazy recollection of it as the drug pretty much turned me into a zombie. 


They do a blood draw and run labs every 4 hours, so my veins are being abused and my arms are bruised.  They change my dressings and check my incision periodically.  I still have my catheter as I'm not allowed to get out of bed which is fine with me since I really don't feel like it anyway.  I still have my epidural in with the drip but my neck is killing me for some reason (and the epidural doesn't reach up that far) so I don't sleep well at all.  The NICU doctor comes in around 1:00 am or so to give us an update on Naomi - they had to intubate her and give her surfactin (I think that's the name of the drug for her lung maturity).  He anticipates that she will do very well. 


The next day is a bit of a blur.  I get switched from the epidural to a morphine drip so at least my neck stops hurting; I'm pressing the button as often as I can.  Brian is torn all day between me and Naomi, trying to be there for both of his girls.  I was miserable.  I couldn't even keep water down; I threw up everything.  When our family left last night, nothing had happened, so they have no idea that I'm on mag and Naomi's in the NICU.  I'm in no shape to talk to anyone and I don't know who Brian ended up telling that morning.  I'm pretty sure he just told people as they called and not everyone called; some people just showed up assuming all was well.  At some point Brian went down to the NICU to check on Naomi and left his phone in my room, so all of our phones are ringing while he's gone (my phone, his phone, the room phone) and I don't answer any of them since I can't reach them and don't feel like talking anyway.  Visitors are coming in my room and I'm having to explain everything.  My throat is dry and dehydrated since I can't keep water down and barely bother drinking it anymore.  I actually threw up into a plastic container in front of some visitors.  I'm overwhelmed and exhausted.  Finally when another visitor comes in, I call for the nurse to get my husband.  I just can't take it anymore.  He comes and finishes the visit for me which is good because I proceed to nod off.  Brian handles the next visitors and I nod off a lot - while people are talking to me, praying over us, etc.  In the afternoon, the lactation consultant comes in with the hospital pump so I can begin pumping breast milk for Naomi since I can't feed her.  I barely stay awake but luckily it's not too difficult. 


Naomi self-extubated and was put on oxygen that morning, a good sign.  However, she still hadn't passed her first poo, so she was diagnosed with a meconium plug.  They fed her through an IV and did a contrast enema to determine the extent and location of the plug and to try to unplug it.  Brian had to tell me all of this later.  I feel horrible for him.  He's having to handle all of the NICU stuff on his own and I know it's got to be difficult for him to stay so strong for our newly expanded family.  He was a trooper and my rock through all of this. 


That evening around dinner time, I was finally taken off the mag, they removed the morphine drip, and I was finally transferred to my post-partum room.  Brian and a couple family members watched as the color came back into my face and I came back to life.  Within two hours, I was practically a new woman.  I tried to hold down some liquids (water and broth).  At first, it didn't stay down, but finally did. 


Also, I finally got to go down to the NICU and see my baby girl at one of her "touch times".  The NICU has touch times when they change her diaper, take her temperature, and hold her.  She's got an IV in her head (since they couldn't get it in anywhere else), the oxygen tubes, and monitoring wires.  My friend Stefanie is right, it does make it very difficult to change her diaper, feed her, or even hold her.  It's hard for our family too as they aren't having the experience they expected either.  They aren't seeing and holding and cooing over their new little family member like they want to.  Finally Brian and I go back to my room and settle in for the night.  What a day!


More to come...

Naomi's Birthday

Here is the story of little Naomi's arrival.  Sunday night, I was given the Cervidil (the drug that ripens your cervix),  I was moved to a proper labor and delivery room with a labor and delivery mattress (not comfy for sleeping on), as some women will actually go into labor with just this drug.  My IV was started back up since I couldn't eat anything after midnight and we started on the birthing journey.  Nothing really happened and we didn't really sleep much (neither of us was comfortable). 

In the morning the doctor came into check me and found that I was only dilated 1 cm.  They started the Pitocin drip.  The doctor didn't seem too concerned, but we could tell that I hadn't progressed as far as she had hoped.  By midday I was having several contractions, but not in any kind of pattern and they weren't increasing in frequency or intensity.  The doctor rechecked me and there hadn't been much change, maybe a bit over a cm.  She reiterated her plan to do a cesarean if the induction didn't work.  I did get a bit of a pain med since the contractions were really uncomfortable and we had a sinking feeling that I was headed for the c-section.  I didn't see any point in being in pain for a labor that wasn't going anywhere.  It felt like a Texas Martini from Trudy's in Austin - ahhhh. 

As the afternoon progressed, and my labor didn't, Brian and I began to resign ourselves to the increasingly likely outcome of a cesarean.  I really didn't want a cesarean because of the recovery involved and the decreased amount of immediate bonding you get to do with your newborn.  As expected the doctor came in around dinner time to check on things (which hadn't progressed any further than they were at lunch time) and ordered the c-section. 

We had already told our family not to come to the hospital as these things can take all day.  We said that we would call them as soon as the baby's arrival was imminant.  Of course, that meant that they called to check frequently and it was difficult to have to tell them that nothing was happening.  :)  By around 5 or 6, several family members had already decided to come on in to the hospital just in case.  So we called anyone who wasn't already there. 

Once the doctor ordered the cesarean, things progressed super fast.   Before I knew it, I was being wheeled through the hall, past some family that had just arrived, and into the OR.  They put in the epidural (not at all scary/painful for any preggy girls reading this and worrying about it) and began prepping me.  In no time at all, the doctor made her incision, I felt a bunch of pressure and tugging and POOF, they held up our new baby just over the drape.  Brian could stand up and get a better look at her, but I just got a glimpse of her head.  The nurses whisked her over to the warmer to began all their evaluations.  Brian gave me a torn look and I told him to go be with our baby girl.  The doctor had a NICU team standing by just in case, but Naomi got an APGAR score of 9 and was declared to be in great shape.  She was 6 lbs 3 oz of cuteness.  I got another glimpse of her as Brian held her up near me before they took her off to the nursery. 

At that point, I'm pretty much just laying on the table while they clean me out, stitch me up, count all their instruments and chat about nothing in particular.  I feel nothing and it's not the epidural talking... I don't feel like I've had a baby.  I feel like I've had a surgical procedure and it's just another part of my hospital stay.  I don't feel this overwhelming joy that is supposed to come with the birth of your baby and for this, I feel a little cheated.  I suppose a lot of women who have cesarean births feel this way, but who wants to actually say that.  Apparently, I do, if only to let someone else know that they aren't alone if they feel that way too.  I'm including some pictures from Brian's experience (because they're interesting), but I didn't get to see or hear about any of this until days later.  :(

Once everything's done, they wheel me into recovery.  This part is a bit of a blur as far as sequencing and time, but from what I understand, I'm there for an abnormally long time (2 or 3 hours).  My family moves all my belongings into what will be my post-partum room.  Some family members stop by to say bye.  Brian comes and stays with me at some point.  My blood pressure is monitored - it hasn't changed much from where it was before the birth.  My urine output is monitored - the nurse seems displeased.  They finally bring in my baby for me to see.  She's all swaddled up, so I can barely see her but her face is just precious.  We take our first stab at breastfeeding and it goes okay; at least I had some colostrum.  I notice Naomi's breathing seems odd, like it's difficult or has a little hitch or something.  We mention it to the nurse.  She looks at baby girl's chest and decides to take her back to the nursery to have the doctor look at it.  Then, I find out that my urine output is such that, I will not be going to my post-partum room and will instead be going back to the ante-partum area of labor and delivery.  The rug has been pulled out from under me... to be continued...

Last Weekend of Bedrest

I"m trying to get caught up on my blogging, but now that I have a newborn I find it difficult to do much of anything besides take care of her.  So, I've got her snuggled up in the Moby wrap as I type.  We'll see how much I get done. 

I'll start with the last weekend of bedrest before my induction date.  It was set to be a great weekend as my family shower was scheduled for that Saturday.  The shower was wonderful.  They wheeled me in my wheelchair down to one of the hospital classrooms.  The cake was gorgeous and yummy - it was decorated to match Naomi's bedroom set and was fab.  I loved all my gifts and getting to spend the time with family and some close family friends. 

Unfortunately the fun of the weekend ended shortly after the shower.  I hadn't really felt that great before the shower but I brushed it off so that I could enjoy myself.  It came back with a vengence that afternoon as I started vomiting.  In fact, in the first of what I would later know to be a long series of embarrasing moments, I had to excuse myself to throw up while some family had stopped by to visit and drop off a gift.  Brian and I figured that we better tell my nurse.  I ended up getting an IV for fluids since I couldn't keep much of anything down.  (Kudos to the nurses for even being able to start an IV on my dehydrated, hidey veins.)  When they put me on the monitors, they discovered that I was having some contractions, so I ended up getting a drug for that.  I thought that was odd since I was being induced on Monday anyway and asked the nurse about it.  She said that it wouldn't stop my labor if it was real - not sure about all that but had to trust her. 

By Sunday, I was feeling better and able to hold down food.  Brian and I slept a lot since we didn't get much sleep the night before.  They left the IV in since I would need it for the induction the next day anyway, but stopped giving me anything.  Of course I only got to eat until midnight anyway.  Brian ended up staying the whole weekend as the vomiting/contraction thing was very scary and Sunday night was the start of the induction process.  This all ended up being very weird as we had all my shower gifts still up there and he had no bag packed for the hospital, etc.  Some family went to our house and got Brian some underwear, etc and we prepared to have a baby the next day.  :) 

End of Week 4 and A Happy New Year

Happy New Year!  I can't believe I'm checking off my 4th week in the hospital and passed the 36 week mark.  I love that it was a short work week for Brian because then I get extra time with my hubby and he can get some stuff done around the house to help prep for Naomi's homecoming.  I hate that he's having to take on so much extra but that's just the way this has worked out.  With some family help, he was able to tidy up Naomi's room, set up the pack n' play as a bassinet in our bedroom, install the car seat, and get some other cleaning done.  Another thanks to family for bringing up some home cooked food for us to eat tonight (it's a real treat since we've been eating so much hospital and restaurant food). 

Medically, my status is somewhat unchanged with the pre-eclampsia only worsening slightly.  Over last weekend and the beginning of the week, my swelling increased a bit (not to the level that it was before I was admitted, but nevertheless), so I had a feeling that something was going on.  My doctor ran another set of labs and another 24 hour urine test around Tuesday just to check it out.  My labs were all good (platelets, liver enzymes, etc were good); my urine test did show an increase in spilled protein to the 600s (it was in the 300s, but isn't really "actionable" until it exceeds at least 5000).  So, basically, we just keep monitoring things.  I'll likely have another set of labs and urine test around Tuesday just to be safe.  I had another ultrasound on Thursday and they estimate that she is about 5 lbs 13 oz (give or take a pound) and should be between 6.5 and 7 pounds by delivery.  She also has a full head of hair.  The plan is still to induce around 38 weeks, so I have about another week and a half here before I start working my way down to the active L&D section, the post-partum section, and then home.  All in all, I'll likely be heading home in about 2 weeks.  At this point, it's most likely that Naomi shouldn't have any issues and should be able to go home with us, so that is good news. 

Guess that's about it for now.  We're in the home stretch and are getting excited to meet our little girl and take her home (and take me home).  Thanks to everyone for all your prayers during this time - definitely feeling the love.  :)